Stalking: a form of perverse and malignant attachment to another, who,
no longer being perceived as an autonomous person, is emptied of human
characteristics and reduced to a mere object by the harasser. ---- The
English term literally means 'to stalk' and derives from hunting
language to indicate the behavior of a predatory animal that implements
strategies in order to capture prey. In Italian, where there is no
single equivalent term, it was decided to use the term 'nagging
harassment' (Galeazzi, Curci, 2001). ---- The type of crime, in our
country, has in fact been definitively included in the penal code with
article 612 bis in Law 38/2009.
Stalking is a social phenomenon that is still very submerged in its
dimensions.
In most cases the violence is received from people known to the victim:
often a person who has developed a morbid criminal "way of loving" and
is not resigned to the end of a relationship.
The mass media, very often, when this type of "criminal love" leads to a
murder, speaks of 'mad murders', they speak of 'raptus', but when we are
faced with a passion murder, the raptus , has nothing to do with the
murderous dynamic that concludes a path of obsessive harassment.
"Criminal love" is instead characterized by a continuum, by a path, a
path that began far away and which has its own more or less rapid
crescendo. It started a long time ago also because the subjects who will
commit this crime, as children, most likely experienced attachment bonds
which in some way failed, because they were probably dysfunctional, to
transmit to them that trust, that self-confidence, on which the
development of the individual should be based on and on which his
personality should be structured; this is because probably those who had
to take care of these children have established relationships with them
based on bonds characterized by insecurity and instability,
characteristics that have inevitably been transmitted to these children
who over time in many cases also begin to demonstrate profound anguish
from separation.
The stalker experiences the relationship with the chosen figure as the
object of his distorted love in light of deep wounds that are rooted in
the past and which also lead to very serious psychopathologies,
including serious disturbances in the affective sphere, separation
anxiety/anguish, problems related to addiction and in some cases also
the so-called 'borderline personality disorder' which encompasses all
these aspects.
We remind you that 'borderline', a term derived from the English
language, literally means "at the limit", "marginal" and in
psychopathology it indicates a very serious disorder that lies on the
border between neurosis and psychosis, defined in the Diagnostic Manual
of Mental Disorders as a "pervasive modality of instability of
interpersonal relationships, self-image and affectivity with notable
impulsivity, which appeared within early adulthood and is present in
various contexts".
The person suffering from borderline personality disorder experiences
difficulty in establishing stable interpersonal relationships; moving
from the most complete idealization to absolute devaluation. These
people feel, in short, that they do not exist without someone else, so
they tend to establish relationships characterized by complete
dependence. The emotional reference person becomes absolutely vital for
the individual suffering from this disorder. Faced with the possibility
of abandonment, the person suffering from borderline disorder feels a
real feeling of annihilation, of emotional catastrophe: the person he
loved, from an angel he was, transforms in her eyes into a devil.
All this can lead him to outbursts of violent anger, anger, hostility
and to carry out destructive behaviors for himself and for others.
For these subjects, loving and being loved means completely possessing
the other.
These subjects cannot even imagine that the other could leave them: the
other must be at their complete disposal and over time this will cause
profound relational discomfort.
The moment the other, let's say, somehow no longer accepts to recite
this script, then the patterns will break down and the dependent person
will not accept, he will experience that possibility of abandonment as
something absolutely intolerable.
The danger lies in the fact that in persecution the stalker tries to
recreate an exclusive relationship with the victim, that relationship
that he lost because he had it or because he believed he had it: in
stalking the victim is dominated by the fixed thought of his persecutor,
he spends his days as a function of the fear and anguish that letters,
threats, stalking, messages continually bring into his day. Because at a
certain point the rejected person will say to himself: "either mine or
no one else's". And this is somehow the aim that this subject proposes
in his pathological and indispensable thirst for "love", namely a total
and unconditional possession, a refusal to accept the other's choice of
freedom.
Stalking, even when it does not result in a criminal act, is
characterized by a slow and constant preparation and maturation, which
is constantly accompanied by the presence of obsessive ideas about the
love object which over time and increasingly cancel out the ability to
criticism and control, to the point of influencing the entire life of
the person who lives only as a function of that obsession.
The stalker follows a long journey characterized by a large accumulation
of internal tension, of anger, which desperately seeks a way to unload.
When the first material element of stalking arrives (the first anonymous
letter, the first message) we could read it as a real relief valve, "a
scream to be heard by those who don't understand or don't have the
patience to want to understand. His gesture is communicative and
symbolic." (Marinella Cozzolino, Family crimes. When love becomes
tragedy, Armando Editore, Milan 2006).
In many cases, these ambiguous feelings, these discomforts, very deep
and of which no one is aware and which are nourished for years, suddenly
explode and tell us about stories and people whose paths meet at a
certain point. They tell us about lives broken by deep wounds, about
individuals who seek an impossible cure in relationships that will never
arrive. These stories tell us about a deep pain that will cause more pain.
The mass media very often speak, as we have said, of madness, of
rapture, or write "Stalking: the betrayed husband was stalking his
wife", often using a light, winking tone, allowing something to be
glimpsed or perceived in the woman's conduct. which prompts the reader
to ask "but what did she do to that man to get all this?", or confuses
the stalker with the rapist, with the violent husband. The topic is
generally treated with extreme superficiality, using the term stalking
for any type of harassment, speaking with very little respect for the
victim, implying who knows what murky background. Let's say that little
has changed since the first rape trials where the entire judging
attitude was against the victim and not towards the executioner under
the banner of "if she must have asked for it!".
Today the stalker can carry out various behaviors, prolonged over time
and consisting of sending messages from 'disposable' phones with abusive
and threatening content, in the creation of a fake profile on 'social
media' which is highly offensive towards the offended person , in
stalking, intrusions, etc.
On any given day your letterbox or your email inbox can become the lair
of a poisonous snake, the most devious, the most cowardly, the most
ignoble: it can contain one of the vilest tools of psychological and
emotional torture used against a person.
An anonymous letter or message.
It's the beginning of a nightmare.
The letters are generally accompanied by other forms of persecution,
stalking and threats.
It is a continuous, sick and perverse intrusion into private and working
life, it is the systematic denial of personal freedom and dignity.
The main motivation for persecution against another human being is the
loss of power and control over him, it is the manifestation of the
fragility of a dominant role that proves increasingly powerless to
dominate and coerce, it is the loss of one's own meaning in life and the
center of one's self.
http://alternativalibertaria.fdca.it/
_________________________________________
A - I N F O S N E W S S E R V I C E
By, For, and About Anarchists
Send news reports to A-infos-en mailing list
A-infos-en@ainfos.ca
no longer being perceived as an autonomous person, is emptied of human
characteristics and reduced to a mere object by the harasser. ---- The
English term literally means 'to stalk' and derives from hunting
language to indicate the behavior of a predatory animal that implements
strategies in order to capture prey. In Italian, where there is no
single equivalent term, it was decided to use the term 'nagging
harassment' (Galeazzi, Curci, 2001). ---- The type of crime, in our
country, has in fact been definitively included in the penal code with
article 612 bis in Law 38/2009.
Stalking is a social phenomenon that is still very submerged in its
dimensions.
In most cases the violence is received from people known to the victim:
often a person who has developed a morbid criminal "way of loving" and
is not resigned to the end of a relationship.
The mass media, very often, when this type of "criminal love" leads to a
murder, speaks of 'mad murders', they speak of 'raptus', but when we are
faced with a passion murder, the raptus , has nothing to do with the
murderous dynamic that concludes a path of obsessive harassment.
"Criminal love" is instead characterized by a continuum, by a path, a
path that began far away and which has its own more or less rapid
crescendo. It started a long time ago also because the subjects who will
commit this crime, as children, most likely experienced attachment bonds
which in some way failed, because they were probably dysfunctional, to
transmit to them that trust, that self-confidence, on which the
development of the individual should be based on and on which his
personality should be structured; this is because probably those who had
to take care of these children have established relationships with them
based on bonds characterized by insecurity and instability,
characteristics that have inevitably been transmitted to these children
who over time in many cases also begin to demonstrate profound anguish
from separation.
The stalker experiences the relationship with the chosen figure as the
object of his distorted love in light of deep wounds that are rooted in
the past and which also lead to very serious psychopathologies,
including serious disturbances in the affective sphere, separation
anxiety/anguish, problems related to addiction and in some cases also
the so-called 'borderline personality disorder' which encompasses all
these aspects.
We remind you that 'borderline', a term derived from the English
language, literally means "at the limit", "marginal" and in
psychopathology it indicates a very serious disorder that lies on the
border between neurosis and psychosis, defined in the Diagnostic Manual
of Mental Disorders as a "pervasive modality of instability of
interpersonal relationships, self-image and affectivity with notable
impulsivity, which appeared within early adulthood and is present in
various contexts".
The person suffering from borderline personality disorder experiences
difficulty in establishing stable interpersonal relationships; moving
from the most complete idealization to absolute devaluation. These
people feel, in short, that they do not exist without someone else, so
they tend to establish relationships characterized by complete
dependence. The emotional reference person becomes absolutely vital for
the individual suffering from this disorder. Faced with the possibility
of abandonment, the person suffering from borderline disorder feels a
real feeling of annihilation, of emotional catastrophe: the person he
loved, from an angel he was, transforms in her eyes into a devil.
All this can lead him to outbursts of violent anger, anger, hostility
and to carry out destructive behaviors for himself and for others.
For these subjects, loving and being loved means completely possessing
the other.
These subjects cannot even imagine that the other could leave them: the
other must be at their complete disposal and over time this will cause
profound relational discomfort.
The moment the other, let's say, somehow no longer accepts to recite
this script, then the patterns will break down and the dependent person
will not accept, he will experience that possibility of abandonment as
something absolutely intolerable.
The danger lies in the fact that in persecution the stalker tries to
recreate an exclusive relationship with the victim, that relationship
that he lost because he had it or because he believed he had it: in
stalking the victim is dominated by the fixed thought of his persecutor,
he spends his days as a function of the fear and anguish that letters,
threats, stalking, messages continually bring into his day. Because at a
certain point the rejected person will say to himself: "either mine or
no one else's". And this is somehow the aim that this subject proposes
in his pathological and indispensable thirst for "love", namely a total
and unconditional possession, a refusal to accept the other's choice of
freedom.
Stalking, even when it does not result in a criminal act, is
characterized by a slow and constant preparation and maturation, which
is constantly accompanied by the presence of obsessive ideas about the
love object which over time and increasingly cancel out the ability to
criticism and control, to the point of influencing the entire life of
the person who lives only as a function of that obsession.
The stalker follows a long journey characterized by a large accumulation
of internal tension, of anger, which desperately seeks a way to unload.
When the first material element of stalking arrives (the first anonymous
letter, the first message) we could read it as a real relief valve, "a
scream to be heard by those who don't understand or don't have the
patience to want to understand. His gesture is communicative and
symbolic." (Marinella Cozzolino, Family crimes. When love becomes
tragedy, Armando Editore, Milan 2006).
In many cases, these ambiguous feelings, these discomforts, very deep
and of which no one is aware and which are nourished for years, suddenly
explode and tell us about stories and people whose paths meet at a
certain point. They tell us about lives broken by deep wounds, about
individuals who seek an impossible cure in relationships that will never
arrive. These stories tell us about a deep pain that will cause more pain.
The mass media very often speak, as we have said, of madness, of
rapture, or write "Stalking: the betrayed husband was stalking his
wife", often using a light, winking tone, allowing something to be
glimpsed or perceived in the woman's conduct. which prompts the reader
to ask "but what did she do to that man to get all this?", or confuses
the stalker with the rapist, with the violent husband. The topic is
generally treated with extreme superficiality, using the term stalking
for any type of harassment, speaking with very little respect for the
victim, implying who knows what murky background. Let's say that little
has changed since the first rape trials where the entire judging
attitude was against the victim and not towards the executioner under
the banner of "if she must have asked for it!".
Today the stalker can carry out various behaviors, prolonged over time
and consisting of sending messages from 'disposable' phones with abusive
and threatening content, in the creation of a fake profile on 'social
media' which is highly offensive towards the offended person , in
stalking, intrusions, etc.
On any given day your letterbox or your email inbox can become the lair
of a poisonous snake, the most devious, the most cowardly, the most
ignoble: it can contain one of the vilest tools of psychological and
emotional torture used against a person.
An anonymous letter or message.
It's the beginning of a nightmare.
The letters are generally accompanied by other forms of persecution,
stalking and threats.
It is a continuous, sick and perverse intrusion into private and working
life, it is the systematic denial of personal freedom and dignity.
The main motivation for persecution against another human being is the
loss of power and control over him, it is the manifestation of the
fragility of a dominant role that proves increasingly powerless to
dominate and coerce, it is the loss of one's own meaning in life and the
center of one's self.
http://alternativalibertaria.fdca.it/
_________________________________________
A - I N F O S N E W S S E R V I C E
By, For, and About Anarchists
Send news reports to A-infos-en mailing list
A-infos-en@ainfos.ca
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